This is due to my own lifestyle. Yet it is also due to the many never ending thoughts which seem to attack me at night...If anyone knows a cure for thinking too much, please let me know. *sigh*
Yesterday was a good day. I bought a new shirt (blue, baby doll like dress, strapless, terry towl material) and wore it to the Gate. I got to hang out with a few of my friends playing go fish and cheat with GIANT cards. My small hands could not mange to hold them all without help, and a little cramping of the hands. Good times were had by all. We then proceeded to Burger Baron and had a good laugh and goofed off. Then over to my house so I could change and get ready for the Gate. My friends sat at the table and chatted while I changed my shirt, jeans, and earrings, with clothing choices helped out by my mom. My mom is great. I really love her a lot. We then left my house, dropped off my two friends, and it was jus my boy friend and I. So, my boyfriend and I went to the Gate where Kiro was doing their sound check and set-up. Ryan and Barry (two guys from the band) then came over the the guys place with us and we sat around watching the hockey game, chatting and eating Kraft Dinner. Then off to the Gate, and the aftergate concert (Kiros was playing). I had a fun day all in all. I did get home around midnight and went straight to bed, however did not sleep well and am now very tierd.
Have you ever been so tierd that your eyes hurt, and felt somewhat dry? What about so tierd that you felt like you were taking drugs and could not focus? It's like, as slow as your body is moving your mind is not comprehending it all fast enough. My observations of what is going on (eg. where I am walking, and what I am seeing) is not processing fast enough. I have almost walked into a few walls today already. That can't be a good sign.
If someone wants sympathy should you give it to them? What if they are the type of person who has little confidence in themselves unless you baby them? Would giving them sypahthy (say when they are sick and keep moaning to get your attention) help them, or hinder them? I can see that it would help them to feel loved and cared for, and then maybe they would get back a little confidence and pull themselves together. However, it might hinder them because they will always get the sympathy they long for, and then will never try to improve who they are. Then comes into factor that we are to turn the other cheek, and we are to love others as ourselves. How does that come into play for you? If you were in their shoes what kind of help would you want? Or would you even want help? See, this is confusing because everyone would want something a little different. So, if I give someone the type of attention that I think that I would want if I were in their shoes, and then they tell me later that they do not want that, have I done something right or wrong? So many questions could come of this and I doubt that any of you have all the answers in a way which we would all understand. Why don't you email me your response. Let me know what you think about this. Do I give this someone the sympathy again, taking into factor all of the above, as well as the fact that they have hurt me countless times over, or do I move on and let go of this person and the internal conflict that they cause me to feel inside? I look forward to hearing what you all think about it.