I was busy and life was going alright. I neglected my online diary even though I felt there was much to write about. Now here I am again, this time however I am sad, very sad. I hate feeling this way. Things started to get crappy and I thought I could take care of it. Things felt like they were alright. I was doing well. Emotionally I was fine. A little sad and hurt, but I knew and understood the situations. Now, well, the past few days I have been near tears, or in tears. I wish that I could blame it on the time of month, but I hate coping out. I need to deal with my problems. I need to deal with my stress. I need to let it out...so tonight, tonight I will have a little rum to calm me and I will cry and go to sleep. I am going to force myself to cry it out. I have had enough of holding it in and making myself physically ill. Tears might fix something...or at least be a step in the right direction.