Today I didn't bring a lunch to work, so I am going to have to decide where to go, and what to get. Yummy, food!
Last night was interesting and I don't feel like sharing too much about it because it hurts. Last night I did one of the hardest things that I have ever had to do, to one of the people that I love most in the world. Long story short, I told one of my best friends that I could no longer have the same realtionship that we have both grown so accustumed to. I have been hurt often, and let it slide, but I know that I need to step back from the realtionship if I want to grow and consider my options without hesitation. I love him I really do. I am stuck on the fact that I know I am making the best decision for me, but I am afriad that that my "leaving" him may not be the best thing for him. He didn't say much, but I think that he was hurt. I told him that I still want to be friends and that I still want to spend time together, I just can't be as close to him as I have been...
It hurts. I have had people do this to me before and it is very painful. I always told myself that I would not do this to someone else, yet here I am...I just don't know what else to do. I feel like eveything that I say to him is taken for granted, and that I am often taken for granted. I have poured out my heart and I don't know what to do anymore...
I hope this pain leaves me soon.
On a less depressing note, I am happy that it rained today. I love the rain...the smell, the texture, the feeling it leaves in your lungs...YUM!